Meet my niece Annie. Annie is six years old and wants to be a clown when she grows up. I want to be Annie when I grow up.
Life has a way of throwing you off balance one in a while. Ok--maybe more than once in a while. But have you ever felt like things were humming along pretty nicely and then "wham", life throws you a curve ball? Or maybe it actually feels more like a tidal wave? Yes. That seems like a more accurate description now that I'm thinking about it...
In those moments it can feel like a spotlight is pointed at you, shining a light on your situation for the world to see and well, quite frankly, judge. And let's be honest, people are judging. I'm not going to pretend that I'm above being judgmental because I'm not. Although there is nothing that will humble you more than going through a life trial. I was talking with a teen recently about something she had going on and she said "I just know people are talking about me and what happened."
"Yep," I told her. "They are."
I'm not going to lie to her because that's just being unauthentic. People talk. People judge. It's human nature. Sometimes it's because they think they could do it better. Often it's because it gives them a false sense of security. ("At least I don't have the Morgans problems"). Occasionally they think they are being helpful. (Here's some advice: usually they aren't).
It begs the question "why?" Why do we let other people get into our heads? Why do we let other people question how we live our life-how we raise our children, live our religion, spend our money, use our time? Why should it matter?
I'm not sure it does. Outside of the obvious--not doing intentional harm to our loved ones and living within the law, it's not really up to anyone else to make us question or feel badly about ourselves. Heaven knows we are pretty good at doing that to ourselves.
Nobody knows us except God. He knows and loves us perfectly. He knows our struggles. He knows our heart. He knows the path HE has designed for us--not the one we think He has designed for us, or others think He has designed for us.
I'm working on saving my energy to be my best self. MY best self--not the person someone else thinks I should be. I heard this great quote today: "Other people's opinions of you are none of your business."
How great is that? And true! Too much of our energy gets taken up with worrying about how others view us and to what end? How does that serve us?
When Annie showed up at the park in full on clown regalia, complete with magic marker make-up, a snarky teenager teased her about it. She just said "I want to be a clown."
Its for sure--I want to be Annie when I grow up.
Oh--and I'm keeping this photo forever. Because it is AWESOME.
