Take Two: This actually worked pretty well when we only had 4 kids and they were little. I placed a basket at the bottom of the stairs where I threw all the stuff that belonged upstairs and every time they went up they had to take two things and put it away. Then came kids #5 and #6 and I couldn't remember what day of the week it was let alone remember to hound them to "take two."
Mailbox: I found this super cute mailbox at a garage sale and stuck it on the wall. Each child had a slip of paper that they filled out each day that showed they had completed their individual jobs. At the end of the week I tallied the slips and paid out. Problem: half the time they did their job and forgot their slips or I forgot to make new slips. Also I never quite made it to the bank to get the cash out so I was always keeping track of their money in "the bank of Mom's head." It wasn't so accurate...
Zones: A couple of summers ago I divided the house into zones and made really cute little tags that hung in each zone with the name of the person responsible for cleaning that zone. We rotated each week. Problem: This worked for a a few weeks and then came vacations, scout camp, girls camp, a long nap, etc and we never got back on the bandwagon.
And so it goes, and so it goes...
This time I decided to let the masses decide the new system. And thus began "The Great Debate." Some were in favor of policing each other but there was concern that could just bring on a whole lot of contention. Some were in favor of instituting "family cleaning time" as necessary but others balked at the idea of not knowing ahead of time when that was coming (although you would think the foot high sock pile might be a clue.) Jordan figured he had the perfect solution when he said, "if we had surveillance cameras this wouldn't be a problem." (Maybe the towels on the bathroom floor wouldn't be the problem but I'm pretty sure we'd have a whole different set of problems if I installed cameras in the bathroom. Creepy...)
For now, we've made some new assignments and I'm working really hard on making the kids clean up their messes (assuming I can sniff out who made them). In the past it just seemed easier to clean it up myself and in the short term, it probably is. But if you remember, a big part of the reason I started on this little experiment/journey is to help my children be more responsible, resilient, motivated people and I'm pretty sure that me doing the work for them is going to have the opposite effect.
And so, with that in mind...I'd love to hear what you are doing. How do you structure your chore and allowance system? What works for you and even what hasn't. After all, we learn from our mistakes.
This probably only work with little ones, but we are using monopoly money as "Bulkeley Bucks". If they keep their rooms cleaned and toys picked up etc, they earn bucks. And when things get left out they get stuck in a garbage bag, and each week they can use their Bulkeley Bucks to buy back the toys they lost.
ReplyDeleteI don't pay my girls to help around the house, unless it's a special job, or unless they are helping babysitting kids that routinely get dropped off at our house. I try to target chores: Isabella likes to help around the kitchen and wants to learn to cook. Kiara likes to clean the bathroom, so she can listen to her music. Isabella likes to dust and Kiara prefers to sweep,... I find that expecting them to drop whatever they are doing (or whatever show they are watching) immediately, creates resentment. I usually tell them what needs to be done and they have maybe 10 / 15 minutes to wrap things up. My biggest struggle is to delegate and be patient, as I find that it takes them ten times longer than what it would take me to do something. My poor girls!
ReplyDeleteHaving allowance associated with the chores is relatively new at our house. I did it because the boys were trying to earn their Personal Management merit badges, and the financial portion is difficult to do if you don't actually earn any money.
ReplyDeleteWe have had many kinds of chore systems and charts. I learned over the years that the more responsibility I gave them, the more likely they were to do it. Weird. Either they felt the full weight of the responsibility, or I was more likely to follow up because it was more noticeable when they slacked off.
My favorite chore chart is one I made myself. It has slots in it for cards. This makes it easy for me to make new chores or reassign them without completely redesigning the chart.
Because I work outside the home, I ask the kids to pull a lot of weight. And because I ask them to pull a lot of weight, my name is also on the chore chart. We are equals (on the chart). There are 6 days of the week, 6 members of the family, and 6 different chores. Each person gets a different chore every day. Currently we have Living Room (pick-up or delegate pick-up and vacuum), Dishes (= 1 load and 1 unload of the dishwasher), Sweep (dining room, kitchen and entry way), Bathroom (replace hand towels, take out garbage if full, wipe down countertops), Laundry (= 1 wash, 1 dry, 1 fold), and Dinner (plan, make or help make, clean up after).
It's not flawless. The Dinner person and Dishes person are supposed to work together to clear the table after dinner, but it's usually me. One load of laundry and one load of dishes per day isn't enough to keep up, so I have to do extra. We have the same darn things for dinner every week. The deep cleaning is still up to me.