Is that a Lama??

Every year I leave the holiday season thinking that there was more we could have done as a family to really embrace the true meaning of the season.  And yet, I can never quite put my finger on what that should be other than I feel like we should spend a little less time thinking of us and a little more time thinking of others.  That's why when I saw a FB post last week from a local church asking for help serving Thanksgiving dinner to the homeless I jumped at the chance to participate.  Now, I have good kids who really are great about appreciating what they have.  Maybe it's because there are so many of them and they've spent a lifetime sharing pretty much everything--video games, toys, friends, clothes, etc.  Regardless, I'm grateful that they see the blessings afforded them in this life.  However, sometimes we get a little too caught up in ourselves and so I thought it would be great to start the holidays doing something for those less fortunate.

That's why at 11 am today you found us headed to a local church that was not our own.  Now, going into this adventure the kids were willing, if not a little leery.  You see, this was outside our comfort zone and if there is anything us Morgan's like it's comfort--doing what we know.  We eat the same food, go to the same restaurants, watch the same episodes of a TV show over and over.  I mean, we go to Disneyland every year and I think part of the reason is that we could get around the park with our eyes closed.  I guarantee you that if you put a blindfold around any of our kids, turned them around three times and pushed them in a direction they could get to the castle strictly by following the sounds of the Matterhorn and the smell of churros.  So feeding the homeless was going out on a limb for us.

But here's to show you that sometimes the lessons you set out to teach your kids aren't learned in the way you thought they would be.  You see, there were about 100 volunteers and a total of 12 homeless people.  Yep, 12--and I felt a little sorry for those 12 because that was an approximately 8-1 ratio as far as volunteers go which was pretty overwhelming.  I had envisioned my family talking with and interacting with those less fortunate and from that, they would step outside their comfort zone and experience something new.  Here's the thing, they did gain just that--but not in the way I thought they would.

For those of you who don't know us too well you need a bit of background.  We are LDS (Mormon) and both Dave and I were raised in the church and of course our children are as well.  We are well versed in our LDS culture and that is what our kids "know."  In fact, I don't think any of our children had been to another church ever, until today.  And let me tell you, it was WAY different than what we are used to.  For starters, there were Lamas there.  Lamas!!! And an ATM machine.  And a gift shop.  And video cameras!  Now, that's not to say that's bad, it was just WAY different than what we were used to and so we used that as a teaching opportunity.  It gave us great insight into how others who come to our church might feel for the first time.  ("Where are the lamas?  You have no lamas?")  It allowed us to recognize how grateful we are for our friends and church family that we know so well as we were strangers to this church today and that was really uncomfortable.  It caused me to reflect on how sometimes we get so used to what we have that we don't take the time to appreciate it when we don't have it.  

All of this leads back to the challenges I continue to face in getting more organized and teaching my kids self reliance.  It's so easy to do what's "comfortable" but it's by stepping outside that comfort zone that real change can happen.  And I think lamas are also involved--I'm just now sure how yet...

Embracing Imperfection

My original goal when I started this blogging adventure was to find a way to be held accountable for trying to get myself and the kids organized.  I think that was a noble goal but I've realized that all that's really come out of it is that I'm starting to realize that I'm a little bit (maybe even a lot) crazy.  Every night I lay awake thinking about all the things left on my to-do list and I can't figure out why I can't seem to get on top of them.  It doesn't seem like it should be that difficult and yet, it is.

Have you heard that story about the grasshopper and the ant? Basically it defines two types of people.  Lousia Plummer, a modern day author had a unique take on the story.  First, there is the ant who is an industrial, hard working soul.  The ant's home is always tidy.  Her children eat home cooked meals every night, never have to scrounge through the sock basket for two socks that match and  every evening their homework is done, piano practicing is complete and all 12 of them are in bed on time. (Or something like that.)

Then there is the grasshopper.  The grasshopper is the opposite of the ant.  Her house is messy but that's because she's neck deep in finger painting with her toddler, baking bread for a sick neighbor and writing the script for the upcoming school play.

The moral of this modern day story is that even though the grasshopper and the ant are different--they both have a lot to offer and neither one is "better" than the other one.  I really love that idea and I've spent a lot of time thinking about which one I am and I've come to the conclusion that I'm neither.  I'm a gnat.  You know--those little bugs that are easily distracted, attracted to the light and seem to congregate over a recently shampooed head of hair?  Case in point:

This morning I headed out to the gym with two goals in mind.  First, I needed a work out.  Secondly, I had a Weight Watchers meeting to lead in a couple of hours and I still hadn't prepared so I thought I could kill two birds with one stone and burn a bunch of calories on the eliptical while studying up for my job.  This was a good plan that went completely out the window when I walked by the aerobics room and heard some funky music playing which sounded like a whole lot more fun than the original plan.  So, like one of those pesky gnats drawn to light I made a bee line for "Belly Fit."

Now, if you have not had the pleasure of experiencing "Belly Fit" I will explain.  Its sort of like a cross between aerobics and yoga with a whole lot of flower child, mumbo jumbo thrown in.  I'm really not the new age type but like I said, it had some funky music that was calling to me.  So there I was, "throwing my earth fireball" and "stirring my pot of energy" (I am not making that up) and thinking about why I can't seem to get my act together.  This went on for the next hour and the whole time I'm trying to "unleash my inner goddess" I'm thinking, "forget the inner goddess I just want to know why does an organized life seem to elude me?"  What is the solution?  And then, as I lay on the floor at the end of my work out (you know it's a good class when you get to practically take a nap at the end) I  got in touch with my "heart center", "embraced my imperfection" and attempted to accept it.

I'm probably not ever going to have a perfectly clean house.  It's not going to be look like it came out of a home decorator magazine.  There, I said it.  The chances of that happening are pretty much nil--unless I get a live in housekeeper.  Which I'm like 99.9% sure will never happen.  And I'm going to have to be ok with that.  My life is busy--and not just busy but full.  Full of kids and teenagers, and band boosters and church assignments, and service and work and dates and Baja Fresh.  And happiness.  A whole lot of happiness:-)

I'm not giving up--I'm just going to try to not be so hard on myself.  There's loads of room for improvement --but I'm going to try to be ok with small gains--like matched socks--instead of a complete overhaul.  And who knows?  Maybe all those small gains will add up--to a whole laundry room full of folded clothes.  In the meantime maybe stirring my pot of energy wasn't a bad way to spend my morning after all.  I'll get in touch with my happiness chakra and get back to you.


P.S. I know you've all been kept up at night worrying about that smell in my den.  I know I was--I had visions of dead rats or raccoons or worse under my floorboards.  Dave, being the manly man that he is braved the crawl space and happily reported that there was nothing under there.  In the end, it ended up being our surge protector--how weird is that?  Jordan figured it out--he came in, took one smell and said it smelled like moldy electronics.  (How he knows what the smells like, I have no idea) but there you have it.  $24 later we had a new cord and the smell was gone.

What is that smell?

There is a seriously funky smell coming from under our house.  It started a couple of days ago and seems centered in the den--at first I thought it was just the "boy funk" which seems to creep in there after one or more boys has spent time holed up in there playing Minecraft for hours on end but alas, it is not.  I know what you're thinking:  something's dead under the house.  My thoughts exactly and those that know me know that a dead animal ranks right up there on my top 5 list of things that seriously freak me out.  And if it's a dead rodent that's like a top 3 event.  You know what freaks me out even more?  Live rodents.

I wasn't always aware that I have what can only be described as a phobia involving mice.  Nope--it made it's appearance about 9 years ago and if you haven't heard the story, well you're about to...

We had been having a bit of a mice problem in our kitchen cupboard.  These weren't little mice either--these were like corn fed muscle mice--and we'd caught several.  Then one afternoon as I was doing the laundry I pulled the clothes out of the dryer and guess what jumped out at me?  A MOUSE!  That was enough to warrant a call to the exterminator--a robust man by the name of Norm who not only had the biggest plumber's crack you have ever seen but also looked like the mice he was hunting had chewed holes in his clothing.  But nevertheless, Norm's strategies were effective and soon we had the mouse problem under control.  Or so we thought.  A few weeks later one of the boys was digging around in the cupboard under the stove and said, "Mom--I just saw a mouse!."  No way!  I instructed him to pour some poison back there and we called it good.  All was well until a few days later.

To truly understand what comes next you must first have a clear vision of the scene:  It was a lazy summer morning and I was wearing my pajamas and had yet to shower.  Also, in addition to my six children I was watching my sister's 4 children which made for a total of 10 (yes 10) kids under the age of 12 at my house.  As I rounded the corner smack dab in the center of the kitchen is a half dead mouse slowly dragging across the floor.  Sick!  "Ok" I think.  "I'll just go out to the garage, grab the shovel and scoop this sucker up and toss it outside. " So I get the shovel and I kid you not, I could not do it!  I was seriously freaked out--which of course is freaking out the 10 kids.  On to Plan B.  I figure I'll find a neighbor to do it for me.  The kids suggest  Christine Shurtliff across the street, and don't get me wrong, Christine is one of my favorite people in the world but when it comes to half dead rodents she's absolutely no help.  So off I go with me in my pjs, carrying my shovel with 10 kids trailing behind me.  Except our next door neighbor wasn't home.  Nor the one next to him, nor the one after that.  I have now freaked myself out enough that I know there is NO WAY I'm going back in there with that thing dying in my kitchen.  And then, across the street I see a new family just moving in!  Salvation!  So off I go (in my pajamas, no shower remember) holding a shovel and dragging 10 kids.

I introduce myself to this gentleman: "I know you don't know me but I have this situation..."  I then proceed to explain my predicament and after looking at me for a long moment he agrees to come over with his teenage son.  So off we go and guess what?  When we get to my kitchen IT'S GONE!!! Now, I know that that thing was nearly dead so it stands to reason that it couldn't have gone very far and the only thing worse than seeing a half dead mouse is NOT being able to see one that you know is there.  So, I'm up on the couch (with the shovel and the 10 kids) while these two strangers root around the kitchen for like 15 minutes.  Finally the guy looks at me and says, "Miss, I'm sorry but I can't seem to find it."  Uh...By this point I am seriously this close to having a major freak out so I look at him with a crazed look in my eyes and say, "You don't understand.  If you don't find it, I'm going to freak. Out."  The poor guy stares at me, nods his head and replies, "Ok Miss, we'll find it."

By this time his wife has come and after some more rooting around we eventually find it hiding behind a Target bag (of course.)  The wife PICKS UP the mouse with her BARE HANDS and starts petting it!!!!!  What????  As they head out the door the man looks at me and says, "You should probably have a drink."

So there you have it--a glimpse into more of my crazies.  I have more stories too--a bat in the fireplace, a squirrel in the attic but I'll save those for later.  In the meantime we're still trying to get to the bottom of the stench.  Dave braved the crawl space and says he can't see anything--I'm holding out hope that it might just be the pond stinking it up because heaven help me if it's something that was once living...

Candy Crush Anyone?

It's time for me to get serious about having a clean house...We had a sweet gas fireplace insert put in this last week and I HATE it when I'm embarrassed by the state of affairs around here.  I mean it's picked up generally speaking but then the guys wanted to use the garage.  The GARAGE people!!!  That's not fair.  And to get to the garage guess what they have to go through?  THE LAUNDRY ROOM!  So not fair!

 I am seriously wondering how people keep their houses all nice and straight.  Clearly they don't play Candy Crush...

I've narrowed down my problem before here on the blog--I'm easily distracted.  (Candy Crush anyone?)  But it's also a little more than that I think.  I always have like 7 different things going at once.  For instance, here are my current "little" projects:

1.  Completing on-line training for my job.  I like my job but that took about 2 hours this morning of me sitting in front of the computer and having to click "next slide" every 15 seconds.
2.  Revamping the children's rooms for the Festival of the Nativities--which is really great and I'm happy to do it but this involves me scouring Craig's List for things like burlap sacks (totally scored those last week!) and cool Tiki Huts (scored that too!)
3.  Hunting down auction items for the upcoming dance auction. (Hey--anyone want to donate something for that?  That's called multi-tasking...)
4.  Developing strategies for keeping one of my children organized when it comes to schoolwork (there's a whole other post...)
5.  Organizing the garage better--see previous comment about the fireplace guys.  So embarrassing...
6.  Planning my lesson for my young women on Sunday--ironically we will be discussing the value of hard work and being self reliant...
7.  Trying to get our pond taken out so we can replace it with a patio.  (Right now I just look at it every time I leave the house and think "stinkin' pond...")

But the thing is, other people have all of these things going on and still manage to be able to let people in the house without crossing their fingers that they won't have to actually use the bathroom while they are there.  Or worse, check the electrical box in the garage...

So what's the answer people?  How am I going to figure this out?  I've been thinking about this for a while now--ok more like about 45 minutes but for me that's a while--and I think I've got to do a couple of things:

1.  Acknowledge that while my house is not as clean as I like it, it's still a long way from being featured on "Extreme Hoarders," so there's that I guess.

2.  Set aside time each morning and evening for general pick up.  I really think that the general clutter could be taken care of in 10-15 minutes each morning and evening IF I actually did that every day.

3.  I'm going to revisit the "Fly Lady" website.  I used to really take advantage of that tool but like Dave says, "I think we drop kicked Fly Lady to the curb."  http://flylady.net

Wish me luck--it's pretty clear I'm going to need it.

PS:  By the way--check out my link here on the blog to "Everyday Mormon Women".  Recently I was asked to write a post for this great site and while it's a little more serious--it comes from my heart.  I was featured on Saturday of last week.  (Oh wait--there's item #8 on my project list!)
http://www.everydaymormonwomen.com/2013/11/bearing-burdens-with-christ.html

"Turning the other cheek--or leaf--as the case may be."

For those of you still following along on this crazy train you will know that my last post centered on the rude comment my neighbor made about the leaf situation at our house.  As you can imagine, this has generated a lot of comments from my family and friends.  When I told Dave about it he remarked that it was a good thing his "two hour wind dance" had paid off.  My friend Stephanie had a brilliant idea to take shifts under the tree to catch each leaf--I seriously laughed out loud at that one.  I am not going to lie--her comment seriously stuck in my craw, so to speak.  I found myself thinking about it every time I looked at the leaves and it was riling me up! I kept thinking about what witty comment I could make in reply should she happen to judge me again and by the end of the week I had plenty of them on deck, I'll have you know.

The other thing her comment did was make me NOT want to go out there and rake--like my own silent protest of sorts but a couple of days ago I bit the bullet and spent several hours over the course of a couple of days cleaning up the mess.  Here's the outcome:

We managed to rake up 15 bags of leaves and the yard is full again--and the whole time I was raking I kept thinking about that dumb comment and getting more and more feisty.  (Doesn't this woman know that I have a to- do list a mile long and raking up leaves falls below "Candy Crush" on that list?  Does she just sit around in her house all day judging my yard and if so, I can't imagine what she has to say about the recurring mole situation.  And if she thinks that poorly of my yard, heaven help us if she looks in the window and catches a glimpse of the sock piles and mystery plunger that seem to persist.)

Which leads me to yesterday--I was on hour three (3!) of leaf detail and by this point I had strapped the leaf sucker -upper thing to me and was plugging away when I looked up and guess who was in my yard---right in front of me?  Yep--THE NEIGHBOR!!!  As you can imagine, I was furiously going through all of my snappy comebacks I'd stockpiled because this time, for crying out loud, I was going to be prepared!  But guess what?  The neighbor sheepishly pulled out two pints of raspberries and offered an apology!  She told me she had been having a bad day and what she said was out of line and it had been bothering her for the last week!  At this point I was back to being speechless other than to say, thanks and offer this brilliant remark:  "It's just a really big tree."  (I know, I know--eloquence is speaking is apparently not my forte.)

So after all my complaining and obsessing and seeking for retribution I learned a valuable lesson.  I learned that sometimes we are just having a bad day and we say stupid things.  And on the converse side I learned that we need to be careful of saying stupid things because there are people out there (like me apparently) who will put way too much stock into those stupid things.

My goal for this week is to try to be better about letting things go--at least the things that don't matter.  In the meantime, I'm off to suck up more leaves.  Again.

"Really???"

Fall is in the air and while the colors are beautiful the change in season presents one challenge here at the Morgans:

This tree is ENORMOUS!  And while it is beautiful this is what happens to our yard:

So for the next few weeks it will be an endless battle to try to stay on top of these falling leaves.  I think last year we managed to rake up over 50 giant bags!  

This is a picture I took several years ago after one of our near daily raking sessions--and of course I have a story to go with it.  Just thinking about it is riling me up...

It was a really rainy day and our yard was (again) filled with leaves.  You can go out and spend two hours raking, go in the house to warm up and come back 20 minutes later to a yard full of more leaves. It's sort of maddening.  So that rainy Saturday morning I got all 6 kids up and we set out to rake the yard.  (This is a mothering feat in and of itself).  I was feeling pretty proud of the fact that all six kids were out there being pretty industrious and not complaining (too much) when our old lady neighbor pulled up in front of our house.  "How nice," I thought.  "She's coming to commend the kids on what hard workers they are being."  Uhhh..not so much.

Cranky neighbor rolls down her window, leans out with a look of disdain and says to me (I am not making this up), "I'm glad to see you finally raking your leaves up--they blow into my yard."

Seriously????  THAT'S what you're going to say to the mother of six who has like a thousand things to do on any given day and who is out nearly every day raking up piles and piles of leaves?  And you're going to say that in front of my children?  Needless to say this did not go over well with me but of course I was too stunned to think of a snappy comeback.  (I know, I know--my instinct should be to turn the other cheek, but dang it crazy lady, you try keeping up with a zillion leaves from a 50 foot tree!) Luckily, I have those boys with the Morgan wit gene so after we finished cleaning up I came back inside as one of them stayed out to "finish something up."  What was it, you ask?  Well, his own witty response to that mean old lady:  a sign staked in our yard that read"

"LEAF ME ALONE."

Hilarious right?  Man, sometimes I love these kids...And it seems like it might be time to resurrect that sign because today was windy and I came home to a yard full of leaves and guess who stopped by?  Yep--cranky neighbor pulled up to the house as McKay and Davis were leaving to rehearsal and instructed them to "clean up your yard--those leaves are blowing down to mine."  And McKay's response:

  "Yep--I'll get right on controlling nature for you lady."

So here's the dilemma--I was going to go out and rake but right now that is about the last thing I want to do.  What I want to do is take out my leaf blower and blow them straight down into her yard but of course, I need to be the bigger person.  So I'll rake...after a long windy nap...

I'm living in THIS?

We just got done with a fabulous visit from Dave's parents and brother this past weekend.  I tell everyone I meet that I have the world's best in-laws--it's the truth.  But what is it about having company that makes you look around your house and ask, "I've been living in THIS?"  I mean, I guess you just get used to living in your own mess and it doesn't seem that bad until you look at it through someone else's eyes.  Now don't get me wrong--my in laws are very nonjudgmental (or if they are they do a pretty good job of keeping it on the down low) so they aren't making me feel bad--I've got that covered myself.

Why is it that some people just seem to be able to always keep a clean house?  There's got to be some secret--because I see these houses on Pinterest.  And they are clean.  The problem is I have complete cleaning A.D.D.

Here's a recent example:

The other morning at about 7:30 am I decided that I would take the garbage cans and yard debris out to the curb for Dave.  He usually does it but he was under the weather so I thought I would help out.  Since we have already established that I am NOT a morning person I was still wearing my pajamas and my hair looked like I had just slept on it.  Oh wait...I had.  To further add to the ensemble the only shoes I had sitting by the front door were my black ballet flats, of course.  You already know how lazy I am so I slipped the flats on and set out to get the cans.  As I was putting the yard debris out I realized that it had been really windy and there were branches all over the yard so I figured I might as well throw those in there while I was at it.  Then I thought as long as I was doing that I might as well rake the leaves and pull some weeds (remember--the in laws were coming).  This is all happening while I am in my pajama/ballet flat/crazy hair ensemble which wouldn't have been a problem because my cul de sac is pretty deserted.  Except right then the yard maintenance guys for the neighbor showed up.  Well, I looked just fabulous and they must have felt sorry for me because they started cleaning up my leaves for me.  Well I figured I had some extra time now so I went back into the garage where I then saw my drill with the screw bit in it.  That reminded me that for the last 8 years--yes, 8 years-- I had wanted to repaint my house numbers.  So that explains why at 8:00 am I was standing on a 5 gallon bucket unscrewing house numbers and looking homeless while the neighbor paid for her guys to finish my yard work...

That is my typical MO for house cleaning.  I'll start out with one simple task and then get sidetracked by 4 others and usually the first task never gets completed!  I'll make lists and then forget to look at the list.  I'll write a reminder on my hand and then won't be able to remember what the reminder is for.  I've got problems people!  It's no wonder I keep losing all those kids at Disneyland...

Anyway--my goal for tomorrow is to see a project thru from beginning to end without getting sidetracked.  It's a lofty aspiration but with a little bit of luck and whole lot less of Pinterest it might just be attainable.